Goal Talk: Reaching Goals as a D Student
As a wellness coach, I talk about goals a lot. I help people set goals, celebrate goals, reach goals, and sometimes even abandon goals. And thanks to all of this goal-talk, I often find myself mentally developing goals for people in the course of innocent, daily conversations. I'm a goal addict, its true.
Over the years, I've started to notice patterns among those who reach goals and those who struggle with them. There are definitely ingrained personality traits that make some of us more goal-driven than others, but even laid-back folks can achieve aggressive goals without being, well, aggressive. It’s all in how you use the Three Ds That Make the Difference.
I also like alliteration and anything in threes. :)
When it comes to reaching goals, there are three elements that I've found to be consistently necessary: Deserving, Determination, and Discipline.
They deserve it! People who reach their goals feel that they deserve to. I don't mean this in a selfish way, I mean this in a self-care way. And, there are two elements here: feeling that you deserve the outcome, and also feeling like you deserve to do the things that it takes to achieve the goal. If you want to get in shape and you decide that time at the gym is one of the steps to reach that goal, then you have to believe that you deserve time at the gym. That you deserve time to yourself to take care of you. For busy and guilt-stricken moms, this can be tough. But, you do deserve a healthy body and you do deserve to do the reasonable things it takes to get there.
They're determined! People who reach their goals are determined to do it. Let's face it - doing the things it takes to reach a goal is downright difficult sometimes! Work, kids schedules, weekend events, travel, and any number of things can get in our way. But my clients who reach their goals find a way to work around or with those things. They are determined, and they make it happen. Its not always ideal or convenient, but it is always a priority and they get it done.
They're Disciplined! Many times the hardest part of achieving a goal is maintaining it once you reach it. Losing weight is relatively easy once you get the math and routine down. Maintaining it much trickier! My clients who successfully maintain and build on their goals do it because they have developed habits that are now part of their lives, not just a means to an end. Many times, its the discipline to make themselves a priority (because they deserve it and are determined to do it) that is the real secret.
Whether you're a fierce and focused goal-driven machine who barrels through goals like a superhero or a laid-back traveler who wants to make some changes without ruffling too many feathers, the Three Ds can fit into your day. Are you using them? Would you add anything to the list? Let me know if you use the Three Ds that Make a Difference in your life!
Till then, keep getting out there and getting healthy!
Heather Fuselier writes for Wellness Without Pity
Image Credit: Chrisin Plymouth